Time to Meet My Wild and Crazy Zoo!

Ah, the fur babies. The dogs and cats. The pooches and cooches. The mutts and felines. I have always been a sucker for animals. And FOR SURE a sucker for rescuing cats and dogs. My wife has been roped into this lifestyle when she married me. We have 3 dogs and 7 cats currently in our home. Today, we are going to delve into each pet and their crazy antics. Trust me, you’re gonna want to dive into this one… it’s super funny and wild!

Let me give some background on this. I’ve been an animal person my entire life. They’ve always gravitated towards me and me towards them. Call it a kindred spirit, call it a kindness, call it a gift… call it what you want, I just have a connection with animal life in the world. I have been this way since I was a wee little thing. My mother says she had a devil of a time once I started crawling and walking trying to keep me from escaping the back of the house and head straight for my daddy’s prize-winning coonhounds to see them. I inherited this trait from my daddy who, although he would never claim it or act like it, he was an animal charmer, as well. Growing up with my parents and sister and living on a farm, we would naturally have animals just show up and decide ‘this is my home now.’ Especially, cats. Mom swore they knew I was there and would take them in and be loved. It drove her and dad nuts. At one point, I think we had over 20 cats when I was younger. Together, my sister and I would love them and take care of them…all outside, of course, dad would have never been okay with a zoo in his house. And rightly so, they are a lot of upkeep. Sounds harsh of him, but don’t let him fool you, he was a sucker for pets too, and the cats and dogs absolutely adored him as well… although, again, he would never admit it and act all tough about it. Stubborn ass HAHAHA. God rest his soul, (I lost my dad to cancer in 2019, we’ll save that for another day) he was the one that gifted me this amazing love for animals. As did my mother, as she, too, has her own love of them and has house cats now of her own.

So, naturally, I always knew that when I grew up and was on my own, I would have my own zoo of pets and be surrounded by animals. It started with one cat rescue, then another, then a puppy, then another puppy, more cats, more dogs. You get the drill. I couldn’t stop, and my wife couldn’t stop getting them for me. She knows they bring me joy and make me happy. I have also dealt with lots of heartache to losing several dogs and cats over the years to freak accidents, illnesses, and old age. It’s part of having pets, but each one lost chips away a little more at my heart (again, a whole other story of my loss, we will also save that for another day. You’re gonna hear that a lot 🙂 ) We now have 3 dogs and 7 cats. We live on a 10-acre farm and the dogs go in and out, they sleep inside the house at night. And every last cat is a spoiled rotten house cat. They are our babies, just like our kids. The kids have grown up with them and are the same as we are about pets. I’d imagine they will have their own pets as adults too.

So, without further ado, let’s get this party started and meet these crazy children!!! I will go oldest to youngest, so buckle up! And to forewarn you, we are crazy people and have like 15 nicknames for each pet, which I will list. They wont make a lick of sense, but we have fun with it 🙂

Delilah (Nicknames: Del Tail, Deltanti, Del Taco, Delzini, Boo boo Del)

13 years old, brown striped short-haired female tabby. She was the cat I adopted after my 1st cat Bubba (God rest his sweet old soul), I felt like he needed a younger sibling to play with and keep him company. I rescued her from a pet rescue. The reason she stuck out to me was her immediate personality when I met her in her kitty crate. I was looking at all the cats and saw her looking all curious at me. I stuck my finger in her crate and went hey baby, sppssspssp, and wiggled my finger at her. And without hesitation, she immediately reared back with her paw and struck me as hard as she could 3-4 times, beating the shit out of my finger. It wasn’t out of malice, it was pure wildness and playfulness. She didn’t hiss or run away, she wanted more of the playing. I knew immediately, with that sass, I needed her. I asked to hold her and she did want ANYTHING to do with being held, claws came out and she clung to me like white on rice. She’s always been terrified of being picked up, but has no problem climbing in your lap to cuddle. I knew by just how sassy and full of life she was, she could be easily misunderstood as being mean, but she wasn’t at all. She just wasn’t gonna take no shit. I adopted her that day. She was 6 months old then. She is now the senior in my house. She has lived a wonderful and crazy life and seen a lot of things and been with me through a lot. She is starting to slow down a little but she still has that sass in her. At times, I will see her swat at the other cats or dogs (we call this slinging gun shots or gun shots fired) and her claws will get stuck. Her claws. Those damn claws, or daggers in my opinion, have never been retracted into her paws a day in her life. I swear it. She will walk with them out, jump with them out, sleep with them out. She sharpens them on the regular. She is ready to murder any and everyone at any moment. Been that way her entire life. We find it quite funny. She will walk and get almost every step stuck in fabric on the couch or blanket because she just won’t retract the damn things. I refuse to get any of my cats declawed because I believe it is not humane. So she just waltzes around getting stuck all the time, at least she’s a good climber, I guess. HAHA. She will give you the meanest mug you’ve ever seen too. I’ve had more sassy looks from her than any other animal in my house. It’s a good thing I know she loves us, because sometimes I think she plots our deaths. I always go on that I ruined her life 10 times over because I kept bringing in new pets and she would stress out… although she would eventually get over it. Even though I like to give her hell, she is my baby and I love her dearly. She knows she is loved, we try to keep her senior life as stress free as possible and she’s fat and happy 🙂

Smoky (Nicknames: Smoke, smoky pokey, smoke poke, moke, moke poke)

8 years old, all white male short-haired tabby. We rescued Smoky as a 8 week old kitten. He was found in the middle of a busy highway by himself. Luckily, unhurt, but without a mama or siblings. We got him along with Bitty, who is not biologically his sister, we just fell in love with them both and got them at the same time. They’ve been together ever since. Smoky has always been the biggest love bug and baby there is. He is big and white and beautiful, with one gold eye and one bright blue. He loves to cuddle and play in our hair, he is obsessed with our hair. He is kind of a wuss too. Haha. The girls bully and terrorize him all the time. He loves to make biscuits on the blanket and suck on it with his mouth like he’s still a baby on his mama’s teat. He grew to be a MASSIVE cat. Biggest one in our house. But even though he’s the biggest, he’s also the biggest scaredy cat out of the bunch. His meow is more of a high-pitched scream, he cries like a little bitch and is as fat as a mud ball. He screams when he is rough housed with but secretly loves it as he always comes back for more. He is one of the sweetest cats we have… he will boop you with such force with his cold, wet nose it’ll about knock you plumb out. He’s also a stress eater, making him fat and round. He’s went on a weight loss journey like the wife and I have recently, and looks a whole lot smaller now and healthy! We think he may also be part albino, hence the blue eye and has the biggest pink nose and ears you’ve ever seen. He is a very pretty boy for sure. We love our sweet Smoke smoke kitty poke 🙂

Bitty (Nicknames: Bitkit, Bitania, Bitty kitty, Bee bee, Beet, Bee bee queen)

8 years old, female grey short-haired calico. We brought Bitty home with Smoky, as mentioned above. Bitty was TINY as a baby, only about 4 weeks old when we brought her home, her and her litter mates were without a mama. She was as small and cute as a mouse and could fit in the palm of my hand. Hence, how she received her name… Bitty. She is to this day, a smaller cat in stature with beautiful green eyes. Don’t let her small size fool you, though. This cat’s attitude comes with a punch. Ever since she was a wee little lad she would run around the house like she was just as big as the others, even the dogs. Her feisty and sassy nature makes Bitty who she is… she was super hyper and wild as a kitten, zooming through the house, Tokyo drifting around furniture and climbing curtains, she would fight any and every thing that came at her. She gives no shits and takes none. She also has the most theatrical and loud meow I have ever heard in a cat. She can sing in at least 4 different octaves, and I ain’t lying. She pulls low notes straight from her butthole and screams high notes from the tips of her ears. She’s been plagued with a stunt in her growth from losing her mama so young, making her small. It has also, unfortunately, proven to make her more susceptible to urinary ailments as well. She has tried to die on me from being sick at least 3-4 times in her life. And I’ve been the one to save her life… every single time. All of this for me to tell you, this shitbag chose my daughter as her person and soulmate. I save the cat and she claims my daughter as her bestie. Sounds about like a cat, right? I like to remind her on occasion just who has kept her alive all these years. She don’t care. This cat will pine for my daughter when she’s gone from the house, cry for her, they are 100% attached at the hip. It’s sickening, really. All jokes aside, Bitty is and has always been a joy to us, always entertaining to say the least. We love our Bitty kitty 🙂

Pepper Ann (Nicknames: Pep pep, Pep dep, Pepper anus, Roonie, Poon)

6 years old, female blue heeler/shepherd mix. The alpha dog. I was lucky enough to rescue her biological mother, Millie. Millie had 1 oopsie pregnancy before we got her spayed, and we kept Pepper from that litter. Pepper was #3 of 8 puppies born. I got the amazing privilege to watch and help birth every one of those puppies. I watched Pep take her first breath of life, she was a fat little mudball of a puppy. Spotted and cute. She always had a calmer demeanor since birth. Once her mother passed, she took over the role as alpha. And boy, does she show it. She is VERY protective of all of us, including her cat and dog siblings. She also gets easily irritated at her younger dog siblings, Gemma and Sadie, and will growl at them in warning to leave her the hell alone. This is when we call her Pepper Anus. She grew up with lots of cats, so naturally, she thinks she is a cat. She won’t bat an eye at the cats. In fact, she will whimper at them a lot to tell them she loves them. Haha. It’s quite cute. She is a pet bag for sure. She nudges the hell out of all of us to be pet and loved on. She will howl at the moon at the sound of a honking horn or siren. She will stand and bark at the wind when she thinks something is intruding on her territory. She HATES the water, but when I do bathe her, she turns a beautiful blue-grey from her blue heeler roots. She’s sprinkled like Pepper, hence her name. She is an itchy girl, even with probiotics, and loves to roll in the grass and scratch her back and ears, kicking her legs in the air in the process. She is my eldest dog now…and I hope, unlike the ones before her I’ve lost, I can watch her take her last breath of life at a very old age, just like I watched her take her first breath of life. We love our dear Pepper Ann 🙂

Boo (Nicknames: Boo kitty, Biscuit, Boo Chicken, Chi, Cha, Bobby Smig, Choo)

5 years old, all black female long-haired. My wife would be Boo’s person. We adopted Boo from a friend of my wife’s. My mother adopted 2 of Boo’s litter mates as well, these are my mother’s house cats now. Boo instantly bonded with my wife. We named her Boo because she was a spooky black kitty like Halloween. She was the cutest little mush, a fluffy like hairball that absolutely loved to play. She stole my wife’s heart. The kids love to joke that she loves Boo more than she loves the rest of us. She will deny it, of course, though sometimes I’m not sure. HAHAHA. Boo rules the roost around here. She is the queen bee. Alpha cat. Sheriff of the town. She is protective of both of her moms, she won’t tolerate nonsense when it comes to my wife and I, she means business. Through that tough exterior though, she’s a sweet girl. She loves to sleep at my wife’s head at night. She loves our other black cat, Kippen, and thinks she’s her baby. Boo loves coffee (redi-whip from a can we use for our coffee, we call it her coffee), and above all else… she loves CHICKEN and TEMPIES (temptation treats). She will live and die for those treats, beg anyone that walks by the treats to give her some. She will fight for treats. She has a real problem, it is her drug HAHAHA. She is a true to form fatty. Thick and fluffy, very healthy, she has the prettiest black and shiny coat of hair I’ve ever seen in a cat. She takes pride in it too as she cleans her herself often to keep it in tip top shape. She loves to play and swat at the others, she loves to rough house. She tolerates the dogs, but when she’s had enough of them she will start slinging gunshots to shoo them away. She has some harsh mood swings. She will love you one minute and be all up in your biz, then the next she won’t want you to touch her at all and fuss about it. Must be a hard life being a princess (note the eyeroll and sarcasm). she is a DIVA for sure. She is the most spoilt of all the dang pets in the house, I must say. I will blame my wife for that. My wife thinks Boo hung the moon. Needless to say, though, we do love her dearly. She is super smart, sassy, and hilarious 🙂

Gemma Roop (Nicknames: G Roop, Jimmy, G, Gemmer)

4 years old, female Husky/Aussie mix. We adopted Gemma at 6 weeks old. She was the cutest fluffy little bear of a puppy. We got her right around Christmas; she was the perfect gift! She is every bit of the breeds she is… super smart and lots of energy, loves to talk and bark, very agile and in shape, a herder of the bunch. Gemma is our adventure dog, she loves to hike with us and swim in creeks. She is also a people person and does a fantastic job reading other dogs and their demeanor and knows how to approach with caution. I’ve watched this dog zoom and wrestle around with her dog siblings her entire life. She is a beautiful dog, very photogenic. She sleeps on her back almost always, legs spread eagle with no shame… she knows she is safe in her house. She is a rambunctious sort and I have to constantly keep her doing something or occupied as the working dog in her requires it. She has lots of room outside to run and play and loves going to our creek to swim. Her love language is licking, she will lick you no matter how many times you try to stop her. She will drive-by lick, quick lick, right in your face lick. She’s a licker, it’s how she loves. She sheds a shit ton, too, the husky in her for sure. She loves the snow and winter, she will prance and bounce around in the snow. We call her our little yote (coyote) because she very much runs, pounces, and sneaks up like a coyote when she plays. She’s sneaky and loves to play tag. She is terrible at fetch, but she does loves to play with toys. She also likes to bring us things in her mouth, no matter what it is. She will bring rocks and leaves, a stick, a toy, trash she has found. She brings it to us and talks to us to show us and tell us all about it. You can tell just how proud of herself she is going from person to person showing off her things. HAHA. We all adore Gemma Roop and love her so very much 🙂

Butter (Nicknames: Butt butt, Butter nut, Butt lint, Butt crack, nutter butter)

4 years old, male orange tabby. Sweet butter. We adopted him at 2 years old from our local animal shelter. My wife found him online and thought he looked sweet. And boy, is he! He’s a big beautiful and handsome orange cat that does orange cat things. He has a greyish-orange tint to his orange hair, making him look almost dirty, but I think it’s pretty on him. He loves to play and wrestle with his cat siblings. And he absolutely LOVES to be beat. Let me explain. He loves spankings on his butt and being rough housed, hence some of his nicknames. He will turn his butt to you and expect you to start beating on it. It gets him so stirred and wild, he will chase you around the house after you do it, wanting more. He’s a thug, he is a big boy and holds his own with these sassy girls that love to fight and rough house. He will gripe and complain when being held too long, not much of a cuddler… but makes up for it with how much he loves to play. He’s a big kitten. He loves to stick his nose up in the air and get pet all across his face and eyes, real crazy like. He, too, loves tempies, much like Boo. He’s a typical boy and loves to hump the blankets, and tries with Boo at times. Like we actually want to see him doing that crap (major eyeroll). He loves to sleep with his face buried straight down, I honestly don’t know how he can breathe, but he likes it. He loves boxes and bags and loves getting inside of them, hiding, and attacking anyone that walks by. He’s packed full of attitude has been a joy to us since we brought him home. We love our Butter boy 🙂

Kippen (Nicknames: Mip, Kip, Bert, Bill, Mippen, Kiptan)

2 years old, all black female long hair. Y’all… this cat right here. She is a Tasmanian devil, tornado, hurricane, and batshit crazy wild child all wrapped into one, very small, cat. We brought her home from my in-laws as they had a litter of cute little kittens. She was the sassiest and most brave of the bunch, she was not afraid of us at all. She may be a touch incest and only riding on about one brain cell. But what cylinders she ain’t firing on, she makes up for in pure unhinged personality. Just like Bitty, being a smaller cat, she is in no way feeble or weak minded. She will whoop anyone’s ass in 2.2 seconds if she takes a notion to do it. I’ve watched her take down the 2 biggest male cats in the house like they were light as feathers. She zooms through this house, skidding around everywhere, climbing walls all the way to the damn ceiling. There is not a spot in this house she hasn’t climbed and gotten into. Her tail has its own brain, she will whip it when she’s mad and shake it like a rattler on a snake. She gets this crazed look in her eyes, with one eye being just a liiiiittle bit off, her tail starts whipping, and you know some shit is about to go down with her. She dumps cups of ice and water, knocks shit off the counters constantly, and loves watching the toilet flush and sits like a creep at the top of our shower door so she can watch the water fall while we shower. Weirdo. She will chirp like a bird and back talk you, this cat has no boundaries or reservations. As much of a wild personality as she bears, she also has in sweetness. She is a cuddler, loves to sleep with us in the bed every single night. She is an eepy girl (sleepy) that loves her bedtime with her moms. She wants her night-nights (pets and kisses) before she goes to the foot of the bed to lay down. This is her routine every single night. She follows me around the house just like the dogs. Kippen has been pure joy and entertainment from the moment we laid eyes on her. We love our Kippen 🙂

Pretty Girl (Nicknames: PG, P Geet, Pretty Bitch, Gremlin)

2 years old, female black and orange tortoiseshell bobtail. My wife found this baby all alone in the middle of the road one night. There were no houses nearby, so she brought her home, no one ever claimed her, so we kept her as ours. She’s a real persnickety feline. She has rocked the boat in this house some with her bipolar attitude. I am her person, she doesn’t really care for anyone else in our house HAHA. She hates my wife as she tries to rough house with her and PG cannot stand it. She can’t stand most of the others. She loves Kippen and they play a lot together. She walks around with no tail and looks like a frog hobbling around. Her ears are a tad big for her small head, making her look like a gremlin. She also squints at EVERYONE. We have yet to figure out what the squinting means other than she’s fed up with all of our constant bullshit in this house. She tries to escape the house all the time, I think she thinks she’s living in a prison (trust me, she is NOT) Haha. She does love me though, and I think that’s what ultimately keeps her here. She will nap at my feet, but I can’t let her stay in our bedroom at night because she’s a bad girl and will pee where she isn’t supposed to at times. She is a beautiful and sleek cat and if she’d just get over herself, she’d be the sweetest little girl. She loves to instigate the other female cats and piss them off, then will squall like she’s being murdered when they come back her slinging gunshots. She drives everyone crazy except me, and I just can’t not love her. Despite her crap and sass, we all do love our Pretty Girl very much 🙂

Sadie Mae (Nicknames: Saudie Arabia, Sadie baby, Saudie, Say say)

6 months, female yellow lab/border collie mix. Sadie Mae is the baby of the bunch. She definitely acts it too. We rescued her as an 8 week old puppy. She is so cute and chunky. She is yellow much like a lab, I have never had a dog with her blonde color. She also has a spotted tongue and roof of her mouth. She is a happy and sweet girl. She loves her older sister dogs and loves to wrestle with Gemma Roop. She is still growing and not at her full weight and size yet, but I’m not so sure she will get much bigger. She definitely favors that of a lab much more than the border collie. But she has the smarts of a collie. She loves to swim in the creek with Gemma, loves to play tag, is excellent at fetch, and is a quick learner. She is a little bit of a sissy baby too and will hide behind my legs at the least little thing. She wags her tail so hard it sounds like a bomb going off when it hits things, it’ll bruise my legs at times. She is the waggiest dog as well, when she gets really excited, she will wag her body practically in half. She is a boofer, still learning her bark, and will boof at anyone or anything that approaches her house. She likes to think she sounds big and bad, and her boof does sound that way, but she’s the biggest pushover there is. She follows me EVERYWHERE I go. She will lay outside our bedroom door and wait for me to come out in the morning. She looks up to her big sisters and enjoys very much being the baby of the bunch. Watching her and her sisters wrestle and play in the yard is one of my biggest joys in life. And I will have joy in watching her grow. We love our sweet Sadie Mae 🙂

Shew, that’s all of them! Don’t be surprised if in future posts you see a new addition. I am a sucker for rescuing cats and dogs. I am blessed to get to watch each of them grow and get old with us. It was one of the great goals in my life to be surrounded by kids and animals… and I have both!

Make sure to subscribe and follow along in our pet adventures! I have so many hilarious and wholesome stories to share with you all on all of them 🙂 So until next time…

Remember, Do good, Bee well, Bee happy. Ciao!